The “wedding” or the “marriage”

The “wedding” or the “marriage”

For the first time, in writing I had to check the dictionary for the meaning of this my trending topic ….. The check was to back up my layman definition of the separate words highlighted as the topic…..

Wedding was defined as:

the act or an instance of blending or joining,especially opposite or contrasting elements, the act or ceremony of marrying;

Marriage on the other hand was defined as:

the social institution under which a man and woman establish their decision to live as husband and wife by legal commitments, religious ceremonies, etc. the legal or religious ceremony that formalizes the decision of two people to live as a married couple,including the accompanying social festivities:

Having defined this two according to world accepted views, I would define it according to certain quotes/words from certain friends (single and married)

Wedding had the following definitions:
A day set aside by both families to display and show off their children.
A period of serenren in which parents are excited and the children are attendees.
The most interesting period of the joining of man and woman.
The happiest day for a woman prior to child birth.

Marriage on the other hand has more interesting definitions such as:

The coming together of man and woman under the same roof with the sole goal of mutual survival.
A prison where you are supposed to be confined for life but with all amenities to survive. J
The removal of “I” from every activity to be embarked upon. The “I” becomes “We”.
The total loss of freedom.

A friend said and I quote: “Can someone tell me if the Federal Government has given a grant for wedding/marriage since every Saturday is filled with HML (Happy Married Life)”. This got me laughing and also pondering on this issue. Is Married life really a happy one?

Everyone seems to be getting married but is it everyone that should be especially at the time they are doing so? Sometime ago, I wrote: “Yet another Saturday” and I got a lot of responses (funny ones I must say). J J

It is rather pathetic to see and hear stories of couples seeking divorce after 1 month, 3months, and 2 years, etc.  The fear of this and much more is what makes people like tolmega01 remain single (as a young boy who wants to get it right *winks).

I ask myself: What happened to endurance, patience, forbearance, submission, love, longsuffering? Are these virtues dead and gone with older generations?

To end this, I refer to a funny quote that makes sense especially for the currently single ones: “The wedding ring is the smallest handcuff ever made, don’t be 2 desperate and in a haste to wear it” …

And for the married ones: Life is not a bed of roses, thorns would be there. Stay strong and imbibe the wonderful virtues of old. Always try to remember, the reason you got married and let that sustain you. Above all, Gods help is needed (the religious tolmega01 says) J J

Shikena ……

……the gist continues later.

"Price tag

Price tag

The decision on how to start this was a task for my mind ….. I am tempted to reference songs by some certain musicians but then I chose to postpone the referencing…. Here is the build up to this particular one  …. I woke up on a certain Wednesday morning after being let down the previous day by a lady whom I really wanted to know better ( for the sharp ones guess you know what I mean *winks) ….. the pause … am sure some are shocked at that , am only human after all and I crave such (In 2 baba’s voice “ Nobody holy pass”)…..

As usual, I did my devotion as a striving good boy, said my prayers and the usual morning preparation and rush began as I discovered it was 6.05am (screaming in my mind “yeparipa” 3^rd mainland traffic). I rushed everything and was on my way by 6.35am …. Then tuned the radio to my favorite radio station 96.9 Cool FM (see cheap advert)….. Mannie and the angels are just something else; you can try them and am sure you won’t be disappointed.  Back to the gist, then came a motivational speaker talking about value and then he said something about “Raising your value – surpass all other expectations and then break your own record”…… Boom here came my topic “price tag”. 

The title reminds me of the song by Jessie J titled price tag …..

She said in the song: Seems like everybody's got a price, and then later she said It’s not about the money, money, money…… I like the song so much but the question I ask is if everyone has got a price and it’s not about the money, what exactly is the price?
While pondering on this, another song came to my ever active mind.

It is no other song but the one from the take banana artist (D ’prince) titled “goody bag”. The line that hit me most was: What’s your selling point? This also implies we all sell one thing or the other and for every sale there is a price.

As a sure boy (in my mind), I have seen and I have heard and am still seeing and still hearing.  It is so painful when one walks around and you see the price tag placed on certain people and worse still is to find out how cheap the price tag some people have placed on themselves.

I have a price tag; the value is just inestimable right now because I am a full package (I got the bragging right). Before you yab (insult) me, Ask yourself the question: What exactly is my price tag?

The gist continues with another title soon …………. Stay chilling and please make your price tag a valuable o

"Walking away"

Walking away

Singing Craig David’s song with my sexy voice (that’s definitely a joke) J

I'm walking away from the troubles in my life, I'm walking away oh to find a better day, I'm walking away from the troubles in my life, I'm walking away oh to find a better day
I'm walking away ……….

Then the long pause …….. And the mind begins its questioning once again.

Can one possibly walk away from the troubles in one’s life?  Do troubles ever cease? Can you truly walk away to find a better day? Is there something called a better day? Can you truly walk away?

I suddenly found an answer to these questions …. Am sure u want to know what my answers were J J or probably you just don’t care to find out because you are already answering them on my behalf (the solution providersJ)

The answers found were further reiterated with questions e.g.  The answer to Can you really walk away was YES YOU CAN (in Obamas voiceJ) but the picture below just summarizes the question line.

When is the right moment? Trust me; this is a very hard decision point. In my short stay in life as a young boyJ, I have had to walk away from so many things (love, job, etc let ur minds run wild). The point you decide it is the right moment, the next question that comes: Is it the right decision?

The question line never ceases and this usually defines the enormity and timeliness of taking a decision……….

“Choosing whether to walk away or try harder is a very hard decision to make in life” ….. Trust me on this because I am speaking from experience J J J….

I am so sure am not alone in this line of thought but one key thing is decisions must be made….

To wrap this up, I choose to quote the advice I got from a friend: Talk to God 2 make a decision for you because his decisions are 4 sure the best. All u need to do is assume you are a child that doesn’t know how to lift your leg and waiting for directions.

……. At this point I return to the initial song because truly I am Walking Away or better still I have walked away in some cases.  J

………………..more to come from the busy mind of tolmega01 J

" Hakuna matata "

" Hakuna matata"  …… means no worry

The thought of the title (hakuna matata)  for this was quite a challenge but after deciding on the title, the usual smile on my face J reappeared …….Am guessing you think I have all d problems of this life and I seem to bone my face steady … hell no … just a worried individual like you …..You probably would never know anything is wrong with me……
The worry seems to overwhelm me most days and sends my mind on a constant journey into the world of oblivion (too much grammar …. All I intend to say is unconsciousness) …. I sometimes get worried to the point that I don’t hear u when u talk beside me …it’s that bad ….

I have tried to occupy myself with a lot that seems to be overwhelming ….. However I have learnt some lessons and I intend to share with you the lessons and not the stories …..I can sense your “amebo” instincts ….. no gist jor …   

Below is the list:
-          A lot of things happen to people that explanations cannot be given ….. But not to worry …. All would be well (the most famous phrase ever spoken in this part of the world).
-          Relationships don’t depend solely on love …… they depend on a whole lot ranging from unspoken to spoken…..
-          Not everyone you like, likes you in return or would ever like you sef …… so quit trying to please people...
-          You talk too much, you don’t talk at all, you choose what u say …… people would always pick what they want to pick and draw conclusions …… so just live your life …… YOLO ( You Only Live Once)
-          The seeming smile on a face doesn’t mean total happiness ….. Beneath every smile are other hidden emotions …..
-          Don’t ever think all is well with someone …… your kindness, empathy, support and words could mean recovery or destruction to someone …… be nice.
-          Family is the best thing that can happen to anyone ….. I LOVE MINE …. They are always there during all situations( the good , the bad, the ugly)
-          Relationship …..Very deep thing …. I don’t seem to understand just yet… hope to understand soon …. Don’t crucify me abeg …..
-          Friends …. You really don’t know who your friend is but you can know who u are friends with…… am sure a lot of people will disagree with me…


Enough jor …. At this point I ask myself what have u seen in this small life for u to advice …..    Or for you to even keep worrying……

The singing continues …… Hakuna Matata means no worry          



I hope this doesn’t make me answer a lot of phone calls …. I am in a perfect state of mind …. 

Thanks for the concern ….. ;)*winks
 The mind keeps doing its thing….. Till next time …. Remember don’t worry, Just give thanks

" yet another saturday "

" yet another saturday "  






this is probably an interesting start but also a quick reminder .......let me express the feeling I had when I came across this picture ......

In the composition of a group of friends and their minds  "idsffaplwkmdfh" ( I Dey Scatter For Floor As Per Laff Wan Kill Me Die For Here) ..... mehn chei ... this is anoda crazy formulation based on the state of the mind .......   .....

The torture I experience every saturday is unimaginable ..... a typical saturday starts like this : I wake up probably with a hang over from lack of sleep during the week or the need to make an early journey to my family home( not like i do this every saturday) ..... i can imagine the state of your mind on hearing hangover ..... its not what you think .... although i drink but i never get to the point of hangover...   am sure my drinking friends understand what am talking about......

back to the gist ..... the Saturdays I dont have to travel are more peaceful than those I have to travel ..... i used the word peaceful cos travelling most times means there is a family occasion, a wedding to attend or just a general visit to my people ....... all the three above are always a source of worry due to the people I  come across ...... not like I can do anything about it but mehn .....people can talk and ask questions....

If its a wedding or a family occasion, I hardly step out of the car before I start answering questions such as :

- Where is she ?
- If I mistakenly carry a lady, Is she the one ? Sorry to all the ladies that have gone to a family occasion with me ...... not like am a ladies man ooooo.... maybe if I was, I probably would be married .... I hope this particular line doesn't get me crucified . 
- When is the date ? etc

Am sure, some of you already feel am Methuselah ..... hell no I am a very young boy aspiring to be great  .... and I mean the young in every sense of it ....

This constant situation has made me develop thick skin and turned me to a regular comedian / sometimes rude ( mostly in mind .... I say cant u just mind ur damn bizness a lot ) Thank God people cant hear whats going on in the mind ...this situation has increased my creativity because I have template answers to any  question  .....

Let me share some of my answers ...... Dont know who it might be useful for ....
When asked :
- Where is She ? She is a prefix given to an animal ....... but am sure the she u ar asking is somewhere very safe...... `
- Is she the one ?  ( i.e. when I have lady that accompanied me) The answer to this depends on if the lady in question is single, married or in a relationship .....If in a serious relationship ...  she is the one for someone I knw is the answer ..... If she is married , I speak yoruba and say " abokoku ma ni won " meaning she would die with her husband ...... if she is single, many things are involved : beauty, brains, motive etc .... I keep the answers to this line of questioning till  other times.... when am with a single girl and the question is asked ,..... my mind gets busy once again .... a title for later times .......

Am sure we all have our worries ..... and am sure for some of us this particular title  - yet another saturday is paramount in our minds ....



The great belief is that one saturday soon .... my mind would change the title to this saturday, i dey marry..... Can I hear u say amen if you believe for me and for u too ....



........................................the titled series is back and continues ..........